THE ABATIS PROPOSAL
Since you are already dressed formally (well done, I commend you on your stalwart sense of occasion), I feel it is time to add a new flavor to our communal melange: That of Danger. For this Winter's installment of ASCII, I, Chris Hefner, invite you to be as uninviting as possible.
An Abatis is traditionally a military barricade constructed of material culled from the area surrounding the battlefield and arranged in such a way to offer direct personal violence to anyone attempting to cross the threshold. What spoils lie beyond the ad-hoc architecture of felled trees, rusted wire, salvaged bayonets and sharpened, poxy bones? VICTORY. Voluptuous, immemorial, crimson-streaked Victory.
In this spirit I invite you to create a mix of your most sacred recordings, secrets worthy of military defense, an intimate hope-chest of unspoken passions, the red, throbbing central muscle of your frail emotional being. Create this compilation with love, and GUARD IT. To present it, construct, from the scattered detritus of the metropolitan battle scene you see about you, the most imposing safety device since that of the mighty corset, the bra hook and the HUMAN RIBCAGE. Offer pain and terror for those who would taste of the honey within! How you accomplish this is up to you, however I will here introduce an addendum: Offer us violence with one hand, but mercy and a rewarding caress with the other. Your guarded secret must, at the end of some rigor, be available for consumption. But make us earn it. For the world is an invading army, and the flickering incubator in which swim your willowy, squinting and fragile loves is your last and only true asset.
In this, as in life, you must be wary, violent and crafty while in the same breath offering rewards worthy of such savage steps.
All who take this challenge must signify with red blood or black soot.
Never yours,
-Chris Hefner
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abatis
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